Most Annoying Speech Tendencies11/15/2009
A recently hobby that I’ve acquired is the tiering and ranking of arbitrary subjects in terms of how good or bad they are. I used to do this in terms of favorite anime or characters but now it has totally spiraled out of control. I’ve made lists for best soundtracks, best couples, best tsundere, best anime OP and EDs, best seiyuus, hottest/moe anime characters, the worst of these categories, and of course, most annoying speech tendencies.
However fun this activity is, it is rather difficult. The only lists that I am completely satisfied at the moment are my top anime and characters list, which I will probably share in some subsequent post. This makes sense because I have been working on them the longest, well before this obsession developed. And even these two lists are subject to change, due to the fact that I am always digesting new shows and forgetting or taking older shows for granted (Which reminds me, I better fix my Top 10 anime page of this blog, since that list is about as accurate as me trying to read something without my glasses).
My Most Annoying Speech Tendencies list is by far one of the least developed ones, but it is definitely the most original and has the most potential to be the subject of a humorous post. Keep in mind that this is not a list of most annoying voices, but most annoying speech tendencies. If it were, this list would be way too long to handle; recent anime and annoying voices almost share a one-to-one correlation with each other, and the blame primarily goes to moe, i.e. characters like Asahina Mikuru (forget Mikuru Beam, Mikuru Voice has much more potentially destructive force) (Kugi’s voice is an exception, for those who might see a contradiction in my arguments. I view (or hear, would be more appropriate) her voice as goddamn sexy, rather than annoying). Anyway, without further ado…
Top 6 (Because 6 is cooler than 5) Most Annoying Speech Tendencies
6. Isaac and Miria from Baccano!
Their tendency to always say each other’s name before they speak to each other in an elongated and exasperating manner puts them up at number 6.
Complemented by Onosaka Masaya’s intrinsic ability to put an annoying and somewhat homosexual spin on whatever character he voices and Miria’s screechy voice, most annoying speech tendencies can’t get better than when it comes to this duo.
Now, if you’re asking why are there two characters sharing one slot on this list, you need to understand that if you do split them, it would be like splitting an atom; it is forbidden to do so. fangzhao over at Mikotoism has similar views when it comes to this subject matter.
5. Wilhelmina Carmel from Shakugan no Shana
Carmel-san’s propensity to “de arimasu” everything so consistently is something to behold. Most characters with speech tendencies break out of their habits at least 10% of the time, but not Carmel-san. What adds to the annoying factor is that it is so freaking long. “Desu”, “Nya” and other similar characters are more bearable by the fact that their sentence enders are only one to two syllables, while “de arimasu” extends for a whopping five syllables, multiply that by the number of times she speaks, and you have a character that sits at number five on the most annoying speech tendencies list.
On another note, the fact that subbers actually sub in her “de arimasu” into the English translation makes it that much more annoying. “De arimasu” at the end of a sentence just doesn’t work in the English grammatical structure.
4. Kamio Mizusu from Air
“Gao!” as she hits her head in a cutesy manner with her own fist…
Ugg… I hated this character. Her “Gao” tendencies weren’t even that bad in terms of how often she recited it. It was just too cheesy and fake. I didn’t buy for a second that it was moe or whatever it was trying to convey about her character (that she was retarded?… ). Now that I think about it, there are other characters in Air that were also damn annoying when it came to how they speak: Kirishima Kano and Michiru. I can’t put my fingers on exactly why they were annoying, and I just don’t care enough about the show to pinpoint exactly what made them make me want to vomit out of my ears…
Basically what I’m trying to say is Air blows (no pun-intended).
3. The Misaka clones from Toaru Majitsu no Index
Remember when I mentioned how long Carmel-san’s speech tendency was (Assuming you don’t have anterograde amnesia…)? Well, The Misaka clones’ tendency is much much worse. The first thing you will notice is that they refer to themselves in third person. That wouldn’t be so bad if they didn’t say the fact that they just said something whenever they said something!!!!!!!!!!!!
For those who are confused, basically this is what a Misaka clone would say to you if she hated your guts,
“Misaka really dislikes your guts, Misaka says as she looks at (insert your name here) disgustingly,”
Just like Carmel-san, and probably more so, they never break their own rules. However original their speech tendency was, it got old and irritating very, very fast.
2. Link (The “Excuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse me, Princess” version) from The Legend of Zelda
Now, he isn’t exactly an anime character, but that’s okay, because he’s too legendary to be left out in a discussion about annoying speech tendencies.
I must be clear about the fact that this is the cartoon Link we are talking about, not the ones in the Legend of Zelda video games, the ones that are totally mute…
Here is a video for your enjoyment of this great character.
1. Last Order from Toaru Majitsu no Index
She is a character that inherits the Misaka clones’ speech tendencies with her own twist: She says “Misaka” twice when referring to herself. This might sound like one of those cop-out situations in an RPG or something, “This new monster you encountered is much more powerful, even though it uses the same sprite as a previous monster and the only difference is that its stats are doubled…” but adding that second “Misaka” in there really does magnify things tenfold.
Last Order – “Misaka has the most annoying speech tendency in the whole world, Misaka Misaka states affirmatively as she crosses her arms in her pride.”